Profile Updates [Oct.09-Apr.11]

Didn't want to delete all of this but am updating and refreshing the current profile, so saving this one here...:

Prospective suitors should note the following lyrics: Are You strong enough to be my man? If you read some of my weblogs, you'll know that i've been through quite a bit in the last couple of years. Don't let that make you think i'm a fragile flower that needs looking after. This rose is strong and has come out the other side. i'm now refreshed, renewed, and looking forward to seeing what exciting experiences the future might hold!  i guess i could characterise myself as a kinky romantic. Some days, i would very much like to meet a man who will be my partner, my co-conspirator at this game of life, who will laugh with me, comfort me, support me and guide me. i would very much like to bring laughter into his life, comfort, support and guidance too. i'm looking for a long term relationship, but am aware that this develops over time, and to start there must just be a chemistry and a mutual desire to commit to seeing where we end up. Other days, i'm starting to really enjoy being single and unattached and getting used to my own company. The vanilla side is the most important part, but my man will have a Dominant personality and enjoy inflicting pain in play, but not for the sake of pain. He's unlikely therefore to have a very strong sadistic streak. i'm 36, divorced, no kids. i'm looking for someone who also has had a serious long term relationship and is now looking for another. Not someone who should be embarking on their first serious relationship. Therefore, i think i'm looking in the 35-45 or so age range, but happy to fall for someone who does not fit this neat categorisation. i've been fairly successful in business; i'm educated to degree level. my man doesn't have to have similar credentials but an interest in similar conversation subjects, and cultural backgrounds does help to kick start a relationship. i'm not interested in meeting anyone for casual play, or a casual relationship. i'm not interested in meeting anyone who already has a relationship or relationships. i'm not interested in casual partner swapping and i don't share. i want romance, i want to be special. i want a partner to explore my submissiveness with (if i really am... my best (vanilla) friend characterises me as just a girl who wants a boyfriend and to also have kinky sex with him; also sometimes i think i'm really not a pure submissive, i don't need or want to be 'taught' or 'improved' by someone, that's my job), but also to go to the cinema with, enjoy a good bottle of wine with, and to snuggle up to with when i'm feeling blue. i'm fiercely loyal to my friends, and my partner would always be number one. i find online conversations can often be quite fake and nothing beats real-life. i'm happy to go back and forth a couple times via memo, but after that, i want to meet you in real life. But not on a date. At a munch. So, please, if you want to meet me, find a way to do it in real life, in person, at a munch or club. i am quite active on the scene, and am usually to be found at the Putney and West London munches. Sometimes also U35 and the London munch. Definitely the Ab Fab munch. Clubbing, i enjoy ST, and Crimson is my new fave! (After TtV of course, but as that's a man-free zone... ) Also, when you contact me, please bear the following in mind: if you don't have much detail on your profile page about you (and not just kink), then please tell me about yourself in your memo. i really don't know how to respond to one-liners asking if i want to chat if there is no information to go on... If you give me something to go on, i will respond, although not necessarily immediately. Please also bear in mind: i really really really hate being pounced on when i'm online. The little flashing memo thing just gets on my nerves! If you do it, then know there are points against you before i've even read your memo, so it better be a good one!  Update: if you're not certain you're a Dominant man, i'm not interested. This is because, in my head at least, a Dominant man will be naturally so, and will know that is what he is... Some of my best friends are switches, and i have nothing against switches.. But if you have needs that cannot be met by me, then i don't want to get involved, because as i said before, i don't share and i already know what its like to be in a relationship which doesn't meet all my needs, and i know i would never be happy in such a relationship, so why would anyone else? i hope that makes sense... Update to the update: i'm becoming a little less picky.. from a fun perspective anyway... from a relationship perspective, long-term, settling down thing, i still wouldn't want to share... ___________________ Things i like: Moonlight, sunsets (and sunrises, although rarely up in time to appreciate them!), Monet, Bon Jovi, indie rock, chick rock, musicals, Arthur Miller, William Blake, James Ellroy, fresh autumn mornings (and spring mornings too), Bryce Canyon, Las Vegas, roses, feeling loved, walking hand in hand, Italian food, chablis, sleeping, laughing, Dexter, hugging, clouds, flying, lounging at home, the company of really good friends... Things i don't like: People who judge before they know, people who pounce on you everytime they see you online, arrogance, anger, hate, closed minds, having to get up in the morning, monotony, feeling fragile and hurt, not yet having won the lottery... Why i love the scene: i'm bound to always be a scene person (obviously there will be times when you dip in, and dip out). D/s is best in private. D/s is best in a relationship that takes place in private. But the scene is a *place* where i'm comfortable. In the past, i thought these desires i had were my own dirty little secret, something to be ashamed of, and i never felt myself when out and about socially, i never really knew why, but as a result i never really felt that i could engage with people easily in a social context and instead had few very good friends. Since i've discovered the social side of kink, i've felt totally myself when out at munches, even when we talk about normal stuff, which is most of the time, i feel so much more comfortable. Yes, the scene has its cons as well as its pros, but i love most of the people i've met and the sense of community and fitting in, the welcoming, the lack of being judged, the acceptance, that the scene provides. ___________________ My masochistic/submissive side: i enjoy pain, the impact kind. i enjoy being possessed, feeling owned. i enjoy restraints, and have changed my opinion of bondage - done right it can be really really hot! In the right setting, i enjoy some humiliation. Submission is sexual to me, even when there isn't a sexual element. In public play, i don't believe there should be a sexual element, i was brought up to be a good girl!  i'm willing to explore, but my breasts, especially any kind of nipple torture, are a hard limit! In conversation the other night a light bulb went off. my submission, when it happens, is brought on by the impact some individuals can make in my head. my masochism is a need that i like to indulge and submission normally follows a masochistic desire, rather than masochism following a submissive desire. But i'm only a limited masochist. If it gets too much, it gets too much and it stops! i also think that the man i end up with will need to be very multi-talented, and certainly have a passion for learning. i've been lucky to play with some of the best in their areas and my ideal man will know/learn/excel (in addition to the standard hitty things) single tails, wrapping, fire play, knife play, rope... the list seems to be growing...  My bi- side: (Although i'm very much liking the term heteroflexible) i very much enjoy flirting with and kissing the pretty girls... It's just soooo much fun!  But, for me, it's just fun and flirty. i want a man. And i don't want a man to just assume because i'm 'into' girls, that means a threesome is on straight away. It's so dull when msn chat turns into the threesome fantasy before we've even met! My vanilla side: i'm currently looking for work (there's a recession, did you know?) but was a successful manager for a blue chip company. At work, you could characterise me as a bit of a Domme. i'm a control freak. i'm lazy. i'm am getting fit, trying to lose weight, and have now quit the nicotine.. (i'm a control freak except where i'm concerned...). i was married for 10 years (divorced a couple of years ago), no children. i enjoy my own company a lot of the time... Other bits about me… i'm a bit of a rock-chick, i wear jeans and scruffy t-shirts, i rarely do frocks and high heels. i really am 36 years old, its good genes… Being 36 years old means i've lived a little, but maybe not as much as i could have… i love the movies, i watch too much US-import TV, i'm educated and i love a good debate… never happier than with a good dinner, a bottle or more of wine, and great friends…  rose

__________________________________

And another old profile, but not so old as the one above...

Currently happy playing with friends. Part of me still wants a man to sweep me off my feet, love me, comfort me, laugh with me, grow old with me, adore me... But i'm really not into looking for that man. i keep pushing men away. Perhaps i'm not ready. Or perhaps my knight in shining armour needs to be more resilient, more persistent, or just more innovative in getting my attention... Trust is a big issue. Whereas Blanche depends on the kindess of strangers, i don't trust strangers... But i trust my friends and i do rely on the kindness of my friends... Become my friend, maybe i'll trust you too... If you want to make an effort, read some of my weblogs. You'll also find my last, longer, more informative profile text. You might figure out my alter ego and some of the darker side of me. But the best way of getting my attention? Seek me out in real life. i'm usually around at clubs and munches and people will generally know me and point me out to you. In the meantime... i'm enjoying being single... rose

And the most recent out-take - on the benefits of a ranch:

In the absence of finding 'the One' who I will grow old with, I am having fun playing with good friends. From reading these boards over the last 2+ years, it seems to be fairly common practice for Doms to collect 'stables' of subs... As I'm sure Doms don't like being constricted to the confines of a stable, I am happy for them to roam in the open spaces of a ranch...  Unless I think you might be 'the One', I will be very loath to give up those in my ranch (oh, I do share too though!). They are lovely, they are evil, and I enjoy having fun! On the other hand, there is always room for one more on the ranch....  Oh, and I like kissing girls. (Reading back the above paragraph, I realise that it could sound quite slutty... As opposed to many who embrace the word slut, I only do so on certain occasions, and in the 'real world' understanding of the word, a slut is something I am definitely not. Some random stranger has actually just memo'd me to criticise that playing with my friends might put off the One. Rubbish. If you're the One, you'll meet me, like me, fall in love with me. You simply won't be able to help it. Destiny. In the meantime (because Destiny does not work to a strict timetable) I intend to have fun).

Edited Wed 6 Apr 11, 6:41 PM by rose_in_chains